An unexpected New Year's Surprise Birth!

So Blessed! Ten years ago tonight I was officially dating the love of my life. Nine years ago tonight he asked me to be his wife. And 3 years ago at 10pm this eve, our 3rd son was born in our Sebastian home. After eating pompano that uncle Ira had caught, I sorta knew that it would be a short trip. I snuggled and rested for a bit with your big brother...As the smell of cocoa and vanilla intoxicated our home. Just two hours later, with only your daddy by my side....right into his loving hands you, our sweet baby, were born. As our beautiful midwives rushed up the stairs, there was no stopping this little love from being born. As I sat in the tub, only wearing my wedding pearls, I held on to you my perfect squishy baby boy. My mom and dad peaked in to see our little angel.... as tears filled our eyes we gazed in wonder at you our perfect little bundle. Standing In awe of how peaceful and quickly our miracle appeared, we all felt this must be a dream. Later that night as we all lay in bed, your big brothers giggled and caressed your soft sweet head. Than we wrapped up our family in the incredible blessing quilt that your yaba had made us. We were covered in love notes and blessings that had been hand written by our family and friends in honor of you. When the clock struck 12 we cuddled on the couch, as we watched new years fireworks light up the sky over the Indian river. I held you tight and breathed in your heavenly scent and I knew in that moment what a monumental life you would live. So I say to you, our sweet boy Finly Cruso' Clark, I vow to hold you close for all of eternity. Each night tickling your back while we give thanks to our great creator. As the moon lights the sky we will dream of our wondrous lives together and we will sing with the angels as they whisper our names. With each new day and the rising of the sun, I promise always to see the being you're destined to become. Together my son, we will will create a world full of miracles one by one...Thank you for filling our hearts with your grace. When I see you I see fireworks, new life, happiness and joy. You are our sweet Angel and our whole entire world... you're loved more than you could ever imagine. Thank you for choosing me to be your mom and for picking a really awesome night to be born ♥♥♥ I love you!

See original post of this cartoon here:

http://www.bellybelly.com.au/post-natal/the-motherhood-experience#.UrDuXKXIblJ

Banyan's Groovy Birth

 

My Sunshine

During the twilight hours on April 20^th 2011 I was awoken from sleep with mild contractions, sensations, as I like to think of them. I knew. My partner told me it was probably something I ate, and I went back to sleep. But I knew. I had read very few books to prepare for my labor. I read Ina May Gaskin’s Spiritual Midwifery twice. A collection of beautiful birth stories describing labor as “trippy” and “groovy” sounded like a model I wanted to follow. I ate well, I did yoga, and I trusted my body. I felt grounded and primal. I trusted my midwife. Regardless of our common interest or the connection we made, I trusted her to know what to do when I questioned myself or I needed more medical support.

By 6am-ish the sensations were more intense … I knew. I took a nice shower and spoke to my son. “Welcome sweet boy, let’s make this easy on one another. I love you so much.” My partner rushed around, dropping the kids at school, collecting the birthing tub supplies. He called my mom who told him she had really short labor with her kids, like really short. Pam and Muraiha were on their way as the sun rose providing me with the warm sunny labor I had hoped for. I had no fear, and gently moaned and road the waves. 

From this point it is both hard to remember, while also deeply seeded in my memory. Hours passed and I let my mind wander. I’m not sure where, and I remember everything, but I wasn’t focused on the physical, my body took over and my mind felt somewhat separate. I knew there was no stopping it, and the reward would be more than worth the work. I spent my entire labor on all fours, sipping water and eating when I was hungry.

Pam sat and relaxed, trusting me and allowing my body to do its job. Muraiha lounged on the bed with me, using her hands and knowledge to help me through my labor and delivery. My partner stayed with me at eye level, providing comfort, and my mother was there for me as she has always been, proud and grateful. My big sister was on the phone, listening to me labor while at work! They all gave me love and encouragement, and my midwives assured me when I doubted and answered any questions.

My expressive little baby was born at 11:37am to a room filled with love, celebration, and sunshine. I was peaceful and joyous. Ready to visit with loved ones and snuggle and love my beautiful healthy baby. 

Tristan's Amazing Home Birth

It all began about 2:30 a.m. on October 8th.  I was fast approaching two weeks past my “due” date, and growing increasingly anxious with each day.  Then something started to happen.  It all began about 2:30 a.m. on October 8th.  I woke up to run to the bathroom in the middle of the night for probably the 9 gazillionth time during this pregnancy.  When I laid back down, I thought I felt a slight twinge of a contraction.  I figured I was probably just imagining things again, so I forced myself to go back to sleep.  When I woke up early the next morning, I was still feeling the same type of twinge…and thinking it might be just a little bit stronger.  Hmmm…Is today going to be the day??  I wondered.
I ate some breakfast and went about my day.  I tried to work, but I remember being VERY easily distracted.  I had some homework that needed to get done, but again…distracted!  So, I decided to run out and do a few errands with my mom who was in town, awaiting Tristan’s arrival with me and Tommy.  I drove us to Kohl’s and we walked around and did some shopping.  I picked up a bunch of stuff for Tommy’s future new home in Afghanistan–sheets, towels, etc.  I found a couple of adorable baby outfits that I just had to have for Tristan.  Mom picked out a couple of tops for herself.  Oh, and I found a great robe that would be awesome for right after the birth.   While we were walking around the store I found myself having to pause to breathe a little bit through the contractions.  At this point I was sure I was having contractions, but I was still thinking that it was going to stop and not progress.

When we got home, I was putting everything away, and Mom had already volunteered to make dinner-beef and broccoli out of the Weight Watchers cookbook.  Tommy had been checking in with me all day via telephone and was home for the day from work.  I went into my office to finish up the last assignments for the week for school, all the while having to stop and breathe through those contractions.  I don’t remember exactly what I was working on, but I DO remember that I felt a lot of pressure to get it done!  I finally finished up the assignment and shut down my laptop for the evening.  Mom finished dinner and I was REALLY interested in eating…until I walked into the kitchen.  All of a sudden I decided it might NOT be such a great idea to chow down at dinner.  So, I retreated to my bedroom and called my midwife instead.

Birth Bed all prepped

Pam was wonderful.  When I called her, she at first told me to call her back when they ( contractions ) got really hard.  She was out running errands herself.  Then she called me back within the hour (I’d say it was around 7 pm by now) to tell me she could come whenever I was ready.  I told her we would call her in a little while.   I started to really time my contractions at this point.  I was feeling very anxious, not really knowing what to expect.  Even though I had three other children, never had I attempted to give birth at home, without an epidural or any other “modern” medical treatments.  Tommy was starting to get really attentive towards me and help me through the contractions.  Then around 9 pm I asked Tommy to call Pam and let her know I needed her.  She was at my house with her daughter and assistant, Muraiha, within 15 minutes.  They brought all their equipment in, with Tommy’s help, and began to set up shop in the bedroom.  I continued to bounce away on my exercise ball, whilst wearing my snuggie.  What a sight I was!

Laboring on the ball with my snuggie

Pam came out and was sitting in the living room, watching me work through the contractions.  I remember her telling me to try to relax during the contraction and not tense up so much.  Boy, that was really tough to do!  I had to put all of my effort and concentration into that task.  Pam decided it would probably be a while, and she had forgotten her book at home, so she asked if I minded if she ran home to get her book.  I was fine with that, and she left Muraiha there to keep an eye on things.

Soon after Pam left, I asked Muraiha to check me.  I was really curious as to how far I had come, and how much further I would have to go.  By now it was around 10 pm.  Muraiha checked me and she said I was around 3-4 cm.  Bummer!  I decided I needed a good soak in the bath to help get me through the contractions.

Relaxing in the bath

Tommy was amazing.  He held my hand through the contractions, even through my “death grip”.  He heated the water up when I asked, ran and got the fan for me when I got too warm, kept me covered with a warm towel when I got the chills, and continued to time the contractions for me.  At this point, timing wasn’t really necessary, but it was helping me to stay in a rhythm and pass the time quickly.  Before I knew it, it was 1 am. I had been in that bath for nearly 3 hours!  During that time, Pam had come back and was continuing to check the baby’s heartbeat and check in on Tommy and I to see how we were doing.  I was feeling a lot of pressure, and the jets were starting to really irritate me during the contractions–both the pressure of them and the noise of them.  I decided I was ready to get out!  Tommy helped me out and helped me to get dressed.  I decided I wanted to bounce on the ball, so he rolled up his mechanic’s stool behind me and applied lots of pressure to my hips and lower back, and was constantly massaging my neck and back in between contractions.

Some of the hardest work I've ever done

While he and I were in our bedroom “laboring”, my mom, Pam and Muraiha were out in the living room chatting and hanging out.  It was so peaceful here at home.  There were no intrusions, no loud noises…it was awesome.  I wouldn’t have known they were out there if Pam and Muraiha hadn’t been checking in on me every now and again.

Pam, Muraiha, and Mom (L to R)

I bounced away for quite some time and was getting zero relief between contractions.  I was starting to feel a ton of pressure and told Tommy to tell them that it was time to push.  Pam and Muraiha came back in to check me.  I was at 9 cm finally!  Pushing was just around the corner…I was exhausted, but excited at the same time.  I started out trying to push on my back, just because that is the only way I knew how.

First stages of pushing

This was clearly not going to work.  Gravity was working against me.  I asked Pam if I could change positions.  Muraiha suggested hands and knees, kind of like a squat.  Tommy supported the front side of me, while Pam and Muraiha applied counter pressure warm compresses with a little EVOO to help me out.  That felt AMAZING!  I pushed, and pushed, and pushed.  It didn’t feel like I was getting anywhere except tired, and fast.

I was getting lots of encouragement from Tommy…”you’re doing great babe…come on, push a little harder…you can do it…”  Oh my goodness it was driving me NUTS!  I just shushed him…”SSSHHHHHHHHHHH” I kept repeating.  He was like, “What?”.  I told him to be quiet.  He got the picture.  I was trying to be as nice as possible.  I didn’t want to be the mean, screaming lunatic that is so often portrayed in film and television in birth scenes.  And I CERTAINLY didn’t want to remake the scene from The Backup Plan with Jennifer Lopez.

I continued to push and finally felt like I was getting somewhere.  I dug my grips into Tommy’s shirt (and apparently his bladder, so he told me later) and pushed with everything I had left.  Finally!  Tristan was being born!!  Tristan entered this world at 3:50 am on October 9th, 2010!

The first picture ever taken of Tristan

Tommy was still in front of me, and I got myself turned around so he was sitting behind me, supporting me (as he had been throughout this entire labor…heck the entire pregnancy!).  Apparently he was snapping pictures too…one of the few men I know who can multi-task!

Daddy's first glimpses

What a joyous occasion!  Every ounce of tired left my body.  I was feeling such a rush!  I couldn’t believe at the amazing feat my body has just accomplished!

Looking stunned....definitely not stunning!

Tommy did his daddy duty and cut the cord…what a beautiful moment.

Tommy cutting the cord-so happy to give him this opportunity

I delivered the placenta, and in the meantime was attempting to nurse this beautiful little boy.

Tristan's first nursing session

Afterwards, Muraiha helped me into the shower so I could get cleaned up while Pam, Mom and Tommy got the bedroom cleaned up, bed stripped down and put back together and the laundry started.  When I got out of the shower, my room looked like nothing had ever happened.  All of Pam’s equipment was even packed up, with the exception of the few items they would need for Tristan’s exam.  Muraiha started to do Tristan’s exam once I got myself settled back into my cozy bed.

Tristan's Newborn Exam

The exam wasn’t rushed at all…it was so cool to experience birth from my favorite place…my bedroom.  I was so excited to find out how big my little man was.

Preparing for the weigh in

Oh my goodness…my little guy weighed in at 9 pounds!  I couldn’t believe it!  9 pounds and not a single solitary tear!  Thanks to Pam and Muraiha!!

9 pounds...does that really say 9 pounds??

Once the exam was done, Tommy and I were left to enjoy our new little family, in the peace and comfort of our home.  I honestly can’t compare this experience to anything else I’ve ever done.  This was Tommy’s first ever birth experience and I have to say he is definitely a home birth advocate now.  I would never do this any other way (unless medically necessary, of course) again.  I feel somewhat empowered by the whole experience, and I really feel that it brought Tommy and I even closer than we were before.  He was my rock during the labor, and I was so impressed with how he was there for me.

So in love with our new little guy

Tristan Davis Bowling
Born October 9, 2010 at home
3:50 am
9 lbs, 22 inches

I am special...I was born at home

Lucianna's Empowering Homebirth

My due date came and went and I was convinced that I would be pregnant forever. Everyone kept asking me when I was going to have the baby as if I was holding it in for the right time. I thought for sure that I would go earlier than my due date, since I had constant contractions since I was about 25 weeks. They didn't hurt but I still timed them often, only to disappoint my family and myself. 

The nights leading up to the delivery, I couldn't sleep at all. I was so hot and restless. I would fall asleep after 3am and sleep as late as possible. Each morning, my husband would give me a pep talk and I would cheer up for the afternoon/early evening and then start the cycle again. I did everything, naturally, to help coerce the baby down. I walked and walked and walked... and had a little sex here and there. 

The night before I went into labor was the worst, I cried and cried and tried to keep myself from smashing something. Everyone was always asleep and comfy and I was always up, alone, feeling miserable. Every time I struggled to get out of bed and go pee I would look at myself in the mirror for a few minutes and tell myself that I could do it. 

The next day (July 5th, 8 days after my due date) I got up earlier than normal and felt pretty good. My husband, Matt, had the day off so we went with our friends to look at houses and eat lunch. After lunch, I picked up some raspberry leaf drops at the health food store hoping it would do the promised "uterus toning"... whatever that meant. I had some back pain and cramping but just figured it would lead to the regular disappointment so I didn't freak out about it. I did feel different all day and even said a few times that I was sure it was the night I would finally go into labor. I felt very tired and crampy and wanted to take a nap but I knew my house would be too loud and smelly (my dad was in town) so we all went to my in-laws house to chill. Matt hung out with our friends and his parents while I slept in the guest room. When I got up, I felt normal and was so pissed that my back pain and cramps went away. We decided to go for a walk around the block hoping to get the cramps back but nothing happened.

Later that night, we went to TGI Fridays for my friend's b-day dinner and the cramps and contractions were back. They didn't hurt at all and weren't at all consistent but I still knew I would have the baby that night, even though a part of me was still anticipating disappointment. I ate so much that night, which came back to haunt me later. 

Matt and I went home, played some Peggle on the PS3 and went to bed around 11:30ish. I actually fell asleep for about 5 minutes before I had to get up and pee. I got to the bedroom door, felt some back pain and cramps, stopped, turned around and almost woke Matt up, but decided to go pee and see if it happened again. Sure enough, 7 minutes later, another one. I said something to Matt but it was so bad, I had to run back to the bathroom and poo. When I got back, Matt was up, with the lights on holding a pad of paper, writing down the time. 7 minutes later, another one. Every contraction, I would stand up and lean forward against a wall by my door and stare at the letters on my golf hat. 

I remember seeing and hearing my mom come in the room during a bad contraction and I told her leave for a minute. I just couldn't stand any movement or noise. After a few at 7 minutes apart, they started at 5 minutes and that is when we made all the phone calls and started setting up. It seemed like it took everyone less than 5 minutes to arrive and I didn't even notice or hear my midwife come in. Everyone was running around setting up supplies and getting the pool ready. I felt like a mommy cat while in labor. I just wanted to hide under the bed in the quiet dark and push the baby out by myself. I needed everyone's energy to match mine but they were all running around so my sister and I went into the nursery where it was quiet and slow. At that point the contractions were 2-3 minutes apart and I was moaning through them. 

That is when I puked up the plethora of grossness I had eaten at Friday's, which really grossed out my sister. During every contraction, I couldn't stand any movement, noise, or most importantly, any kind of caressing. No one was allowed to touch me, which I repeatedly had to point out to everyone. I remember feeling like I was stoned. Every time someone would talk, it would take a minute for me to hear it and sometimes I was saying stuff without even knowing I was talking. I kind of remember saying something to my husband about how relieved I was that I didn't have to eat Mac n' cheese with A-1 sauce (he had been bugging me to try it ever since he heard it could induce labor). 

Apparently, my midwife arrived around 1:30 and checked me at 2am (2 hours after I started contractions). They were about 1-2 minutes apart and pretty bad. I remember thinking that they were so bad that I wasn't sure if I could handle transition when it came, since those contractions are usually way worse. When my midwife said I was at 9cm, I was so relieved that I was already almost done with transition and it was only 2 hours into it! 

I stood in the living room in a bikini top and a towel, waiting for them to cool down the water in the pool. I leaned against my mom and then my husband, moaning through each contraction until I could climb into the pool. I got in the pool for what seemed like only a few minutes before I felt the urge to push. 

I got up and went to my bed and had the WORST contraction ever. I think I almost squeezed my husband's arm off with my bare hands. My midwife got me situated in my bed and then broke my water. That is when things really started picking up. It seemed like only a few minutes but I pushed for an hour. At some point, they showed me the head with a mirror and let me touch it, which was encouraging because I didn't feel like my pushing was doing anything, but it also broke my concentration. I felt like after every push, it was going back in. I kept asking if I was doing it right and if they were sure it was coming out. I was convinced they were lying to me because earlier in the pushing I kept feeling and smelling myself poop but when I asked they dodged the question and said no and it was OK. I really didn't care that I pooped but I guess they thought I would. It was kind of funny and relieving so I really didn't care at all. I knew what would come out of my vagina, after the baby, would be way worse. 

I would push through every contraction; usually getting 1 1/2 good pushes in before I felt like I was going to pass out. I closed my eyes and let my mind and body do what it needed to do. Everyone was cheering and counting and telling me I could do it. Toward the end, my vagina felt so stretched that I just kept pushing through the pain and exhaustion until it was out. 

When she finally popped out, everyone kept saying "oh my god, its huge!" and when they put her on my chest, I was shocked at her size. It took me a minute to check if it was a girl or boy and it was hard to see because the cord was between her legs. It is kind of fuzzy but I wasn't at all surprised when I saw her little vagina. Something inside me, for the last few weeks, knew it was a girl. 

Matt cut the cord and then I delivered the placenta (nasty!). Then I held my daughter and she nursed for about an hour while they cleaned me up. After a while, we measured and weighed her. She was 20.5 inches and 9lbs.4oz. (12 oz. less than the doula's guess after seeing her and 2 lbs. more than my guess before seeing her). 

I still can't believe something of her size was alive and kicking inside me for so long. I guess that is why I was so miserably crippled for the last few weeks. 

I remember being so shaky and freezing cold so it felt awesome to take a shower, even if it was difficult to stand. I had used so many muscles pushing that baby out that I felt like I would fall over. In the shower, I got the nerve to feel down there. I had some major hemorrhoids and a small tear near the bottom of my vagina. It was so small that I didn't even need a stitch, which was impressive considering the size of the baby I had just delivered. Thank god for my midwife and her technique. If I were in the hospital, I would have either had a C-section or episiotomy and would still be in pain to this day. 

It only took about 5 days to be able to walk normally. I kind of feel bad because my sister, Kris, went into labor only 3 days after me so not only was I still sore and walking like a cowboy, I was tired from staying up all night with Lu and my nipples were really sore so it was hard to help her. It was the worst physical day for me. I could barely sit up and my nipples were so sore that nursing made me cry but we got through it and ended up with two beautiful baby cousins. 

I am so glad we did the home birth and I am even happier that my labor and delivery only added up to less than 4 hours. I am also glad that I went first because if I would have had to see Kristin's birth first, it might have scared me into the hospital. It is traumatically disgusting and scary when you are on the other side. For me, being the one in the bed, in pain, was easier. 

Overall, It wasn't half as bad as I thought it would be and more joyful than I could have ever imagined. It was amazing! The love you feel for your baby immediately and the sense of accomplishment was awesome. I did it for Lu at first but in the end I can't deny the feeling it gave me as a woman. I am a champion! :)